LADIES.....chose your OWN firearm
"Honey, you shouldn't have! No, I mean it you really shouldn't have!" That's the response many women have after their significant others buy them their first firearm. If this isn't the response at first, trust me, it will be after their first ever trip to the range. And if you ask the husband why he chose the gun for his wife, the answer is usually the same, "I got her a little gun that she an handle easily, you know, something made for a lady." Gentlemen, we love you, but would you feel comfortable going out and choosing your wife's bra? Why? For a multitude of reasons, not the least of which is that you aren't the one who has to wear it. So, why would you feel comfortable choosing her first carry gun? So many times in my basic pistol classes or at social gatherings I find that 9 times out of 10, if a woman is contemplating becoming a first-time gun owner, I usually hear one of two responses, "my husband bought me a little tiny .38, you know, the spinny kind" (snubbie revolver) or "he bought me a cute, little, pink gun with the clippy thing that slides in" (single stack sub compact . 9mm or .380 semi auto.) I politely smile while waging an internal battle with my adrenal gland to prevent my head from exploding. In fairness, it's really no one's fault. I'm not placing blame or judgement because I was once on the other side of that conversation, well, minus the words spinny or clippy. I cringe because, first of all, it is clear, she has absolutely no idea how to operate the firearm that has been purchased for her. That alone has the potential to be very dangerous. Secondly, when she does go to the range to fire it for the first time, her husband will likely load the mag or cylinder and simply hand her the gun on the firing line. She will then likely be using a sub-par grip or worse, a grip that will earn her a trip to the ER, because perhaps she had her weak-side thumb crossed over her strong hand, directly behind the slide. Ouch! Even if no mishaps like that happen, women often walk away with very little in the way of knowledge, experience and most importantly, confidence in herself or her ability to competently operate her new gun. One thing that is almost a certainty is that women realize those tiny little guns are so cute but not very easy to shoot accurately. Oh, and they often hurt like hell! (Don't even get me started on the guys who take their girlfriends out to the range and start them off on a .44 magnum...and with no eye and ear protection!) With that as her first introduction to firearms, it's no wonder that so many women don't like guns. Women make up roughly 51 percent of the population, so we can be a pretty powerful ally for saving the Second Amendment. The addition of our voices could just be the difference between saving this precious God given right, and losing it forever. But the only way that will happen is if we are well trained. The only way that's going to work is if we are successful in our first experience with operating firearms. Guys are generally tinkerers or learn how mechanical objects function by trial and error, and that's fine, but it's not how most of us ladies operate. Women want to know how the gun works BEFORE we pick it up. (And we actually will read the directions!) We want to know the rules. We want to be safe, and most of all, we want to be confident. Believe me, a positive experience with a trained instructor who understands how women think will boost a woman's confidence as well as anything out there. So guys, before buying her that firearm, let her go somewhere where she can try out different models for herself with instructors who can answer questions, find out her specific set of needs and uses for a firearm. Will it be a carry gun or a house only gun? She can also get advice on carry systems, such as belly bands or kydex holsters. Try to keep in mind that entering this world can be very scary for first time shooters, and even more so for women. Once a woman crosses that first threshold, it's pretty life-changing, and for a woman to have the tools to be able to choose the right gun for herself will make the experience her own. And something unexpected that I found is that, shooting and training is something my husband and I can really enjoy doing together. Hey, it beats book club!